Category Archives: Genre

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest (2006)

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Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest

I had no real plans on seeing this new Pirates movie this year. I didn’t really like the first one that much. I’ll admit, it was good fun, but it just didn’t really do anything for me. It was a little long but kept the action.

The sequel, Dead Man’s Chest, was like a treasure map without directions. It jumped all over the place with no real idea of where it was going. The action sequences were drawn out and pointless. The dialog was weak at best.

I didn’t feel anything for the characters. They seemed dumb with no real feeling or attitude or depth. The acting was sub-par. I think Johnny Depp forgot how he played Jack Sparrow in the first movie as I saw parts of his Hunter Thompson character from Fear and Loathing.

Keira Knightly was just going through the motions. She turned into a better actress than what was portrayed on the screen. I don’t even get Orlando Bloom. What’s this guy’s deal? The kid just can’t act.

The only redeeming quality in this movie was Bill Nighy playing Davy Jones. He’s a great actor anyway and brought a little respectability to the role.

Dead Man’s Chest was extremely long. A good 45 minutes could have been cut out of it. I felt sorry the people sitting around me because I kept yawning and moving around in my seat. It was just really slow and boring.

It’d be best if you stayed away from this movie. Wait for something else to come out. Snakes on a Plane will drop on August 18.

Jack Sparrow

Burn The Floor (1999)

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Burn the Floor

Burn The Floor

This is exactly the kind of thing I should love; dancing, music, big production. Unfortunately, the dancing is mediocre, the music is tired, the productions are pointless.

The choreography was about on par with what you would find in a high school production, particularly one where they are intent on keeping all the students on stage the whole time.

The costuming was trying way too hard to be ‘hip’ – as if they figured making it edgy would make it artistic.

I can’t give this anything on the WOM Scale; my friends that like dancing and classical music would be turned of by the edginess, my friends who like edgy would not be interested in the dancing and music…..

Rotten Tomatoes: Critics N/A; Audience 78%

Derailed (2005)

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Derailed

Derailed

Yeah, yeah, yeah – I heard the bad reviews. I like Jennifer Aniston, though, and Clive Owen is usually good to watch (in more ways than one), so I gave it a try.

I tend to like my suspense movies to be, well, suspenseful. This one was so obvious I kept thinking I must be wrong; surely there must be a twist coming that I was not seeing, surely it couldn’t be as insipid as it seemed. Unfortunately, it was every bit as predictable as the alphabet, but not as nuanced.

It also suffers from Thelma & Louise syndrome – two people making bad decision after bad decision, spiraling down into a worsening situation, able to stop it at any point simply by going to the authorities, choosing to continue on their merry little doomed way. By the end you actually want them to get taken out of the gene pool (I was so glad to see Thelma & Louise die – they were just wasting oxygen and police resources).

However, it took my boyfriend to point out one of the big failings – I just couldn’t put my finger on it. He nailed it right away; you just don’t buy Clive Owen as such a wuss. 1 of 5 just because I know a couple of girls who will sit through it solely to look at him for an hour or so.

Rotten Tomatoes: Critics 20%; Audience 61%

Stay (2005)

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Stay

Stay

For this one I am going to give you word for word the review I found on Amazon:

“Striking images abound in the twisty, surreal thriller Stay: Walruses rubbing up against the glass in an aquarium; a corridor painted neon green; entire crowds composed of twins and triplets; a piano being lifted several stories in the air. The plot is impossible to encapsulate: A psychiatrist named Sam (Ewan McGregor, Trainspotting) takes on a colleague’s patient, Henry (Ryan Gosling, The Notebook), who announces his intention to kill himself. As Sam pursues Henry, hoping to save him, the world around them begins to fracture and distort–until the movie’s conclusion, which may induce viewers to argue loudly about whether or not it makes sense. But Stay’s weakness isn’t whether it coheres, but its terrible dialogue. David Lynch movies (a clear influence) work in part because the dialogue is usually simple, even banal, and doesn’t compete with the rich chaos of the visual images and narrative turns. Stay’s dialogue, full of portents, interferes with an intriguingly corrupt (in the sense that digital information corrupts) storyline and eerily dislocated visuals; try watching it with the sound off. Also featuring Naomi Watts (Mulholland Drive), with brief appearances by Janeane Garofalo (The Minus Man), Bob Hoskins (Mona Lisa), and other familiar faces.” —Bret Fetzer

Yep, that about sums it up ~ the movie was disjointed, the dialogue was dismal.

The twist ending was asburd. The plot may have been salvagable, with a different ending. The twist ending does present an interesting idea, however. Had it been explored by a more competent storyteller we may have been presented an intriguing film. This one just left me shaking my head at the time I wasted watching it.

But I give it 1 out of 5 anyway, because I have a couple of friends who like that sort of thing.

Rotten Tomatoes: Critics 26%; Audience 66%

Capote (2005)

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Capote

Capote

In 1959, Truman Capote learns of the murder of a Kansas family and decides to write a book about the case. While researching for his novel In Cold Blood, Capote forms a relationship with one of the killers, Perry Smith, who is on death row.

I must confess at the start of this review that I went into this viewing expecting the best. I think that Philip Seymour Hoffman is one of the best actors working right now, and find his performances enjoyable even in less than stellar movies. I also, generally, enjoy Catherine Keener, and I had heard that this movie was a knockout.
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United 93 (2006)

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United 93

United 93

A real time account of the events on United Flight 93, one of the planes hijacked on 9/11 that crashed near Shanksville, Pennsylvania when passengers foiled the terrorist plot.

If you have not yet seen this movie – go.

If you have already seen this movie – go again.

United 93 posterIf you are afraid to see this movie, don’t be. It is very respectfully done, very moving, and very palatable. This is not an action movie interpretation, it isn’t presenting any specific viewpoint, yet you do get a sense of all the things that went wrong and just how complacent we were. Just how complacent we are becoming again, BTW.

This isn’t a good movie for children, not because of the subject matter but because of the pacing. There isn’t a lot of overt violence to scare them and bad language is minimal. The movie, however, is presented more or less in real time and so young viewers, with no idea of what is unfolding, will be squirmy. For teens, it is a good movie to see, though their level of interest will be directly proportional, I imagine, to their knowledge of the events of 9/11.

For those of us who remember that day, the violence will be mostly in your memories – not on the screen. He does show us the towers burning, and we hear about the Pentagon being hit, but the focus is really on what is happening on flight 93 and with the military, ATC and FAA workers trying to deal with the unfolding tragedy. I found myself tearing up at times that I wouldn’t have expected – and not tearing up during the scenes you would expect to elicit the most emotion.

Really, truly – no matter where you stand politically, you should see this film.

When I say to GO see this, that is exactly what I mean – in a theater with a crowd of people. The experience is compelling. I have never been in a theater that was so quiet through an entire movie – not even candy wrappers crinkling. When the film ended and the lights came up, you could see in the faces of the other patrons the fear and the sorrow and the pride and the questions…

Rotten Tomatoes: Critics 91%; Users 89%

School Ties (1992)

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School Ties

School Ties

A Jewish boy goes to an elite prep school in the 1950’s and hides his religion until a jealous bigot forces it out in the open.

A while back I went through Blockbuster online and added a bunch of Brendan Fraser movies to my queue, every now and then one shows up. Some are throw aways (i.e. Airheads) some are surprisingly good. Like School Ties.

I didn’t watch it right away, once I saw that Ben Affleck was in it I was prepared for major suckage. I would have to say that this may well be Affleck’s best movie, in much the same way that The Outsiders was Tom Cruise’s best movie.

I was expecting just your standard prep school conflict type movie but, while there were certainly a lot of cliches, I was quite pleasantly surprised. Prejudice, traditions, friendship, conscience – and Brendan Fraser (oh, and Matt Damon, Chris O’Donnell….) My circle will love it.

Rotten Tomatoes: Critics 68%; Audience 67%

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