Happily N’Ever After
Bad.
Bad, bad.
For those who couldn’t get enough of SHREK, HAPPILY N’EVER AFTER supplies a similar take on fairy-tale traditions.
Yeah, right. They wish it had anything in common with Shrek.
It gets one star because you could probably use it to keep your toddler distracted for a few minutes.
Rotten Tomatoes: critics 4%; users 21%;
I just found an old Star Magazine that had a review of RV just before it opened in the theaters. The money quote for me was, “when was the last time Robin Williams was in a movie that was funny?” This one certainly isn’t – if you are over the age of 10.
There were bright spots; Jeff Daniels & Kristin Chenoweth as the bizarre but big hearted Gornicke parents, JoJo as a typical teen, um…I guess that’s about it.
Potty humor and predictable slapstick with good production values.
I had no real plans on seeing this new Pirates movie this year. I didn’t really like the first one that much. I’ll admit, it was good fun, but it just didn’t really do anything for me. It was a little long but kept the action.
The sequel, Dead Man’s Chest, was like a treasure map without directions. It jumped all over the place with no real idea of where it was going. The action sequences were drawn out and pointless. The dialog was weak at best.
I didn’t feel anything for the characters. They seemed dumb with no real feeling or attitude or depth. The acting was sub-par. I think Johnny Depp forgot how he played Jack Sparrow in the first movie as I saw parts of his Hunter Thompson character from Fear and Loathing.
Keira Knightly was just going through the motions. She turned into a better actress than what was portrayed on the screen. I don’t even get Orlando Bloom. What’s this guy’s deal? The kid just can’t act.
The only redeeming quality in this movie was Bill Nighy playing Davy Jones. He’s a great actor anyway and brought a little respectability to the role.
Dead Man’s Chest was extremely long. A good 45 minutes could have been cut out of it. I felt sorry the people sitting around me because I kept yawning and moving around in my seat. It was just really slow and boring.
It’d be best if you stayed away from this movie. Wait for something else to come out. Snakes on a Plane will drop on August 18.
Yeah, yeah, yeah – I heard the bad reviews. I like Jennifer Aniston, though, and Clive Owen is usually good to watch (in more ways than one), so I gave it a try.
I tend to like my suspense movies to be, well, suspenseful. This one was so obvious I kept thinking I must be wrong; surely there must be a twist coming that I was not seeing, surely it couldn’t be as insipid as it seemed. Unfortunately, it was every bit as predictable as the alphabet, but not as nuanced.
It also suffers from Thelma & Louise syndrome – two people making bad decision after bad decision, spiraling down into a worsening situation, able to stop it at any point simply by going to the authorities, choosing to continue on their merry little doomed way. By the end you actually want them to get taken out of the gene pool (I was so glad to see Thelma & Louise die – they were just wasting oxygen and police resources).
However, it took my boyfriend to point out one of the big failings – I just couldn’t put my finger on it. He nailed it right away; you just don’t buy Clive Owen as such a wuss. 1 of 5 just because I know a couple of girls who will sit through it solely to look at him for an hour or so.
For this one I am going to give you word for word the review I found on Amazon:
“Striking images abound in the twisty, surreal thriller Stay: Walruses rubbing up against the glass in an aquarium; a corridor painted neon green; entire crowds composed of twins and triplets; a piano being lifted several stories in the air. The plot is impossible to encapsulate: A psychiatrist named Sam (Ewan McGregor, Trainspotting) takes on a colleague’s patient, Henry (Ryan Gosling, The Notebook), who announces his intention to kill himself. As Sam pursues Henry, hoping to save him, the world around them begins to fracture and distort–until the movie’s conclusion, which may induce viewers to argue loudly about whether or not it makes sense. But Stay’s weakness isn’t whether it coheres, but its terrible dialogue. David Lynch movies (a clear influence) work in part because the dialogue is usually simple, even banal, and doesn’t compete with the rich chaos of the visual images and narrative turns. Stay’s dialogue, full of portents, interferes with an intriguingly corrupt (in the sense that digital information corrupts) storyline and eerily dislocated visuals; try watching it with the sound off. Also featuring Naomi Watts (Mulholland Drive), with brief appearances by Janeane Garofalo (The Minus Man), Bob Hoskins (Mona Lisa), and other familiar faces.” –Bret Fetzer
Yep, that about sums it up ~ the movie was disjointed, the dialogue was dismal.
The twist ending was asburd. The plot may have been salvagable, with a different ending. The twist ending does present an interesting idea, however. Had it been explored by a more competent storyteller we may have been presented an intriguing film. This one just left me shaking my head at the time I wasted watching it.
But I give it 1 out of 5 anyway, because I have a couple of friends who like that sort of thing.
Beyond The Sea
It gets half a lip for the times it made me laugh, even if it was unintentional
I was intrigued when I heard Kevin Spacey was making a movie about Bobby Darin – Spacey is a good actor, Darin is an interesting subject..ought to be good, right? WRONG!
Beyond The Sea is possibly the worst movie I have seen in the last 10 years. Possibly worse than a bunch of movies I haven’t seen. In fact, I think the only way to make this movie worse would have been to cast Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez in it.
Sin City
Fan Boys fantasy come true. For the rest of us….eh. Kinda boring, way cheesy. SG seemed to like it, so maybe it is a guy thing. I’m sure SG Jr will like it, but he’s 13, the perfect comic book graphic novel age. My nephews will probably like it since they are teenagers, male and into comics.
Can’t think of anyone else I would recommend it to, so on the Word of Mouth scale it does poorly
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